Linkage

Dita Von Teese is all in silver- Busy Bee Blogger

Shania Twain and hubby struggling with infertility- Celeb Baby Laundry

Kristen Stewart doesn't play well with others- Celebrity Dirty Laundry

Karina Smirnoff to pose nude for Playboy- Ear Sucker

American Idol recap- Fit Fab Celeb

There is definitely something wrong with this photo- Have U Heard

Bill and Ted 3? Tubular!- Hilary Shepherd

One Republic performs on DWTS- Hollywood Hiccups

Jake Gyllenhaal is a playa's playa- I Need My Fix

Jenna Jameson is the queen of porn- Lickable Celebs

Prince Harry stranded in the arctic- Mathew Guiver

Paris Hilton is being sued- Oh The Scandal

David Arquette and Courtney Cox take CoCo to Disneyland- The Skinny Chic

Lindsay Lohan Won't Get Hired

Lindsay Lohan is in talks to play John Gotti's daughter in a new biopic. Of course Lindsay seems to be in "big talkes" every few months and things never work out cause she is a mess. Apparently this would be the biggest movie she has ever been in if she does get the gig. It has a budget exceeding $75 million. That is pretty impressive. Of course Lindsay will invent a way to fuck it up. Trust me, she will.

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Penelope Cruz and Javier Bardem Take Their Newborn Out For A Stroll

It seems like there is a lot of baby news out there today. The most recent news is showing off Penelope Cruz and Javier Bardem taking their newborn son out for a stroll. Kid is cute but it would be better if we could get a close up. I guess Penelope is not the attention whore type to go to a tabloid and sell pics of her baby. Unlike SOME celebs....Mariska.

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Matt Lauer May Be Leaving Today

Apparently everyone at NBC, rather it be the cast of 30 Rock or the members of Today think NBC sucks and they want out. Matt Lauer's contract expires Dec. 31 2012 and he wants that to be his last day. I am sure he could make an announcement if he had the balls to tell the public about what he is thinking but let's face it, he will never have a job as good at Today. Today is awesome. Anyway, good luck Matt.

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Lebron James' Mom Arrested For Assault

This morning Lebron James' mother was arrested for assault. This is a pretty serious crime but I am sure she will not go to jail cause Lebron has more money than God and can probably afford to hire the best attourneys in the biz. Stay strong Gloria!

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Tina Fey Is Preggers

It is being reported that Tina Fey is pregnant with her second child. She saved the announcement for The Oprah Winfrey Show I guess to return the favor that Oprah appeared on 30 Rock. I could really give a flying fuck less about Tina Fey. She isn't funny at all and although a lot of dudes think she's hot, I think they are delusional.

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Mariska Hargitay Adopts!

Mariska Hargitay did not tell the public she was seeking to adopt and this morning People is announcing that she has in fact adopted a baby daughter named Amaya Josephine. There is a great pic to the left and you can tell obviously that baby Amaya is African American but this is a domestic adoption. Mariska didn't raid a tribe in some foreign land like Angelina Jolie insists on doing. Mariska says she is very happy to be a multiracial family. Good for them!

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Linkage

Britney Spears on the set of "Til The World Ends"- Busy Bee Blogger

Jennifer Aniston jokes about marrying George Clooney. LOL! She was just joking...sorta.- Celebrity Dirty Laundry

Kirstie Alley gets a new tattoo- Ear Sucker

Alison Sweeney has a killer bikini bod- Fit Fab Celeb

Mariah Carey thinks this is sexy- Have U Heard

Ford Heiress arrested for DUI- Hilary Shepherd

The Glenn Beck Show has been cancelled- Hollywood Hiccups

Charlie Sheen's babble is getting trademarked- I Need My Fix

The only thing bigger than Wendy William's tits is her ego- Lickable Celebs

Hilary Duff is returning to Gossip Girl?- Mathew Guiver

Amy Winehouse wants to be the worst mother ever- Oh The Scandal

Gwen Stefani covers Elle- Swanky Celebs

Lauren Conrad Strikes 3 Book Deal

Lauren Conrad got lucky and scored a 3 book deal with Harper collins after the huge success of her first two books. Her first book, Sweet Little Lies, was #1 on the NYT Best Sellers list for a while and it seems like it would be a good read. In my opinion, I say good for her. And it wasn't luck really. It was good writing. Being an author is a much more humble job than being a starlet but Lauren will always be a starlet so I guess she gets to have the best of both worlds. Have any of you read Lauren's books? What do you think?

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Taylor Swift Is Off The Market

Taylor Swift had dinner the other night with a Tron star named Garrett Hedlund and since they are both also country music artists and Taylor Swift preys on guys in order to get love songs from her experiences with them, she thought it would be a good idea for them to hook up. I doubt she is dating all these dudes without putting out so she is kind of a slut. Just not your classic slut. I love her.

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Bristol Palin Is Loaded

Bristol Palin earned $262k in 2009 for her work with a teen pregnancy group. That is probably a lot more than what those losers over at Teen Mom make. Suck on that MTV! Losers! Just a few more work with the group and she can afford to buy her own helicopter to hunt wolves with. I know that is her highest priority.

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It Will Be A Girl For K Fed

This news is a couple of days old but everyone is talking about it so I thought I would put it up here. K Fed and his girlfriend Victoria Prince are having a kid together and it is a girl. They are going to name her Jordan cause they wanted a name that could be either a boy's name or a girl's name cause they chose names before they knew the sex of the baby. Of course this won't be a "real" family and K Fed will never marry Victoria cause if that happens, no more alimony for K Fed. What do you call a bastard child that is female?

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Britney Spears May Marry Jason Trawick

Britney Spears and Jason Trawick have been dating for two years now and a lot of people think they should get married because they are good for each other. The fact that the dude is damn near 10 years older than her should repel her from him but Britney is a little loosy goosy so that just drives her closer to him. I personally think they should get married cause just by looking at the guy I know he is a positive influence in her life unlike her last two husbands.

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Angelina Jolie Got A New Tattoo

Angelina Jolie has seven tattoos. She just got her seventh which is a longitude and latitude for Brad Pitt's birthplace, Oklahoma. The rest of the L&L tattoos represent where her kids are from. She got this tattoo in secret cause everything Brangelina does is a secret cause those fuckers hate every one else on planet earth except for themselves. I personally think the L&L tats are lame as shit but she thinks they are cool so for each their own.

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Linkage

Madonna is under a FBI investigation- Celebrity Dirty Laundry

Khloe Kardashian is trying for a baby- Ear Sucker

Hayden Panettiere is braless- Fit Fab Celeb

Ashley Judd admits to drug use and sexual abuse in new book- Have U Heard

Jon Gosselin whores Quizno's on Twitter- Hilary Shepherd

Kate Winslet nude sketching from The Titanic is up for auction- I Need My Fix

Katie Holmes is playing tea party- Lickable Celebs

Channing Tatum is a shitty tipper- Mathew Guiver

The Miley Cyrus sex doll is doing well- The Skinny Chic

The Governator Is Coming

Arnold Schwarzenegger has just announced that first there will be a comic books series and then a cartoon and finally a movie called The Governator. I think this movie will be stupid and I am not sure Arnold still has it but he was very popular in California so I am sure the movie will do well. I looked up to this guy and had like three of his autobiographies when I was a kid. I still think he is pretty good. I am not sure how well this thing will do at the box office but I will definitely be there.

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Sean Parker Is Engaged

Sean Parker, the founder of Napster and one of the early founders of Facebook has gotten engaged. He was portrayed by Justin Timberlake in the movie The Social Network but unlike Timberlake, this guy has pretty much never used his penis. I am sure there are a lot of celebrations when you make your first billion with internet sites and everything but I am sure they throw up after half a glass of champagne and when girls walk into the room they pee their pants a little bit. Congrats Sean, now maybe you will discover you are good at something other than writing code.

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Christina Aguilera Will Judge On The Voice

NBC is coming out with a new show called The Voice where people will sing and compete to win and get $2 billion and a lifetime supply of jelly beans. Of course Christina is a wreck and refuses to get treatment for her alcohol addiction so this will be a lot like a female version of David Hasselhoff on The X Factor. I love Christina but she has to clean up her act. The show will probably suck btw.

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Kate Plus 8 Might Get Cancelled

Kate Gosselin is going to have to step it up if she expects to keep her show Kate Plus 8. She is even going as far as swimming with sharks in an attempt to bring in more viewers. Let's face it, Jon has something to do with the chemistry of the show and without him on it, the show has suffered. Anyway, if the ratings drop below a million viewers, it is over for Kate and her eight kids. I wonder what she would do?

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Rosie O'Donnell Sticks Up For Chris Brown

For some fucked up reason Rosie O'Donnell thinks all the people who hate of Chris Brown are racist. Of course Rosie is one of the most delusional people in Hollywood so everything she says has to be taken with a grain of salt but she seems to be serious. Every time someone tries to go to the aid of Chris Brown some random person in the room should hold up a poster sized pic of Rihanna after the beating and I am sure the Chris Brown sympathy would dry up pretty quick.

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The Gross Quota Just Got Met For The Month

Both Ke$ha and Britney Spears have hit songs on the Billboard charts and Ke$ha thinks it would be pretty cool for them to celebrate by having a theme party where people dress up at Ke$ha or Britney Spears and then the two go skinny dipping together. I guess Ke$ha doesn't like people too much cause if she ever took it all off, that party would clear out quick. Britney on the other hand, let's put it this way, I have never seen a woman lose and gain 30 pounds as quickly as Britney Spears can. Seriously, it is like a week by week thing with her. Either she is slammin' hot or she looks like she just rolled out of a bed in a trailer park. Either way, this party will never happen and I like to pretend it was never suggested.

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Guest Post: Bad Pickup Lines and Awkward Dancing, Britney is Back!

If she told you that you had a nice body, would you hold it against Britney Spears? Probably not!

Earlier this week Britney Spears new album Femme Fatale came out. She did a special 3-song performance on Good Morning America to announce her upcoming tour and celebrate the release of her 7th album.

She didn't look comfortable at all at the Good Morning America performance. She performed Hold It Against Me, Big Fat Bass, and Til' the World Ends, three songs with great dance beats. When it came to Britney's dancing, she looked like she was walking through them in a rehearsal not dancing for an audience. She had small and timid moves not sharp like the typical moves of vintage Britney. Small moves showing off little range of motion are definitely not characteristic of the Britney that her fans are used to. She looked like she was walking carefully through the smoke-machine smoke. She also walked timidly down a short flight of stairs and clumsily climbed on several props on the stage.

She had a "special" announcement that she would be kicking off a new tour in June with Enrique Iglesias. But not too long after her big announcement, Enrique Iglesias rep said that he would not be touring with Britney Spears this summer but continuing his solo tour for his latest album. He said he has a lot of respect for Britney, but would be continuing his tour right now.

While watching Britney wiggle around the stage in an awkward manner, I couldn't help but wonder if she will ever return to her former glory. The music is definitely in Britney fashion, but the dancing left a lot to be desired.

This guest post is by Edwin Daniels, an entertainment blogger for USDish

Follow him on Twitter

Linkage

Play day for SJP and the twins- Busy Bee Blogger

Edie Flaco gets help raising her kids- Celeb Baby Laundry

Reese Witherspoon's wedding photos- Celebrity Dirty Laundry

A Justin Bieber/ Selena Gomez duet?- Ear Sucker

The Apprentice recap- Fit Fab Celeb

The 46th Country Music Awards were last night- Have U Heard

Vanilla Ice is coming to the big screen- Hilary Shepherd

Suri Cruise is turning 5 soon- Hollywood Hiccups

Amy Winehouse is getting married- I Need My Fix

Alyson Hannigan channels Kim Catrall. Now she just needs to get naked.- Lickable Celebs

Justin Timberlake is banging Olivia Wilde- Mathew Guiver

Just what the world needs. A statue of Michael Jackson.- Oh The Scandal

Beyonce has a new album coming out- The Skinny Chic

Enrique Inglasias Is Doing Fine

Enrique Inglesias may have dropped out of the Britney Spears Femme Fatale tour but that doesn't mean he won't be in the headlines. This dude first came on to the scene when J.Lo, Spears and Xtina were tearing up the charts and then I thought he would disappear into obscurity but this guys Latina and Latino following has kept him on top. I actually always liked his music and here he is in FRance proving he is still the performer he has always been. Good call on not opening.

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Lindsay Lohan To Play Sharon Tate

Lindsay Lohan has been offered a film role (she still gets film roles?) for a Charles Manson movie where she would be playing Sharon Tate if she accepted. As many people who have been on this planet for a couple of decades knows all about Charlies Manson and the Tate murder. Tate in real life is MUCH more attractive than Lindsay Lohan but I guess the director is desperate to get the movie made. Desperate enough to let LiLo ruin it for him and send it straight to dvd. There is a fucked up fascination with Lindsay Lohan and the tabloids but no one actually wants to see her in films because she is just... a bad actress. #TeamLindsay!

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Johnny Depp Is Trying To Get Laid

Johnny Depp has gotten to know Penelope Cruz during their latest film Pirates Of The Carribean: On Stranger Tides. They were in Blow together too but that movie sucks. I am sure POTC will too but at least it will do well at the box office. Anyway, he has been working with her and commented publicly that he thinks that she is an phenomenal mommy, good with kids, has great tits, etc. I could really give a flying fuck less about either of these guys but Johnny is starring in a movie called The Rum Diaries which he will be portraying a Hunter S. Thompson induced character named Jack Kemp. The Rum Diaries is one of my favorite books of all time. Should be real good.

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Miley Cyrus Has A Sex Doll

In the first Miley Cyrus packaged item not authorized by Disney, we give you the "Finally Miley" sex doll. I always thought Miley was ugly as fuck and I don't care how many holes this sex doll has or how great they feel, I will not be buying it. Miley is just a fucking dog. Oh yea, and she's suing. That is to be expected.

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Liz Hurley Is Back On The Market

Elizabeth Hurley filed for divorce from her husband yesterday which means I can now hit on her at bars. Sorry... I mean pubs. I can treat her to a warm guiness and fish and chips if she likes. Hell, I can even give up brushing my teeth. As long as she is cool with a jacked up grill going down on her. If she is cool with that, then she is woman of the year.

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Charlie Sheen Bombed

Charlie Sheen in a failed attempt to try stand up for the first time in his life got heckled and booed off the stage in Chicago. I don't think people want to get actual serious advice from a guy who looks like he just escaped a chemotherapy room who has a pension for drugs and hookers. I mean yea I get advice from the dude at the porn shop and talk to drug addicts on a daily basis but I am sure as hell not going to pay MONEY to see one speak at a public gallery. Anyway, I doubt Charlie's ego is hurt too much cause with the amount of cocaine that is in his bloodstream right now, it is hard not to be confident.

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Linkage

Nicole Richie is working out- Busy Bee Blogger

Kingston Rossdale is a player- Celeb Baby Laundry

Steamy pics of Breaking Dawn released- Celebrity Dirty Laundry

Selena Gomez is going on tour- Ear Sucker

American Idol elimination time!- Fit Fab Celeb

Lindsay Lohan doing a little shopping, stealing- Have U Heard

The Hangover part 2 trailer- Hollywood Hiccups

Pink is totally rockin' the baby bump- I Need My Fix

My wet dream occurred and I wasn't there- Lickable Celebs

Rihanna likes to sext- Mathew Guiver

Rebecca Black fans want a Justin Bieber duet- Oh The Scandal

Vanessa Hudgens wants to launch a fashion line- Swanky Celebs

Ashlee Simpson Might Be Off The Market

Pete Wentz shaved off that horrible fro he had been rocking lately and now, all of a sudden, Ashlee Simpson is back with him. They have a kid together which makes the urge to want to stay together stronger than ever. I think they are pretty much the cutest couple in Hollywood and I love their style. Plus, they are just cool people. Their kid is getting big. Anyway, good for them.

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Kourtney Kardashian "Felt Like A Prostitute"

Kourtney Kardashian is not that fond of One Life To Live cause she said she felt like a prostitute when she was on that show. Not to be mistaken for feeling like a whore, an attention whore, which she does on a daily basis. I bet if you handed her a bowl of dog shit and told her that if she ate it she would get higher ratings on Keeping Up With The Kardashian's she would ask, "where's the spoon?"

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Britney Spears Wants Nicki Minaj To Open For Her

OK I am seriously rethinking this whole "Enrique Inglesias has a big ego" thing. First Britney wants someone who has had success for over a decade in the public spotlight, Enrique Inglesias, to open for her and now she has her sights set on Nicki Minaj. WTF? Nicki is one of the most downloaded artists on iTunes and is VERY successful. Why the fuck would she all of a sudden open for Spears? Co-headline, yes. Open? No. Next Britney is gonna see if Madonna will shine her shoes backstage and see if Cher will do her makeup.

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Emily Deschanel Is Preggers

I don't know if any of you tune in to Bones on...whatever network, but it stars Emily Deschanel and if the show is in production, it may have to be put on hold because she is pregnant. I am guessing that is either her husband or boyfriend pictured to her left there but he looks like a pedophile. I would seriously advise any kid to avoid that dude at any cost. Anyway, congrats to the new parents, or soon to be.

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Lady Gaga Kicked Adam Lambert Out Of Her Birthday Bash

Lady Gaga had a birthday party the other night in which she may or may not have shown up in a giant egg. Anyway, she thought that Adam Lambert was too drunk to be attending so she booted his sorry ass out. I know he was real popular on American Idol but that's it. He was popular on American Idol. His career has been nothing since then. This was a bad move however on Gaga's part cause with her new single Born This Way being the all time gay anthem, she should really be nicer to gay people.

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I Don't Buy It

Lindsay Lohan slipped and fell on her ass the other night at a bar and when TMZ approached her she outright said, " I was NOT drinking, nor do I drink!" Did TMZ even ask? She probably carries around negative drug tests and a breathalyzer that is pre rogrammed to always read 0.0 just in case someone got curious. Thing is, you can't quit drinking and then keep the exact same routine you always kept. Especially not a party agenda that Lindsay keeps. I am still #TeamLindsay but I will be pissed if she ends up going to jail cause she is a fuckin' airhead and can't remember putting on a necklace and then walking out of the store with it. Anyway, court date later this month. Happy April everyone!

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